Scott Says

What’s law school really like? What happens if you break a rule? What is the Socratic Method? What does Johnnie Cochran have to do with any of this?

 

 Law School Q&A [4:12m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (33)

I knew almost nothing about law school when I was an undergraduate. As a second-year law student (called a “2L” or “soulless worker drone”) I thought this would be a nice chance to teach a college crowd about the mysterious institution that produced such magnificent American specimens as Clarence Darrow, Johnnie Cochran, Lionel Hutz, Duke lacrosse prosecutor Mike Nifong and Ally McBeal. I also wrote this because “educational” columns count toward my community service. (Stupid mailbox, why did you have to be on a public street when I peed on you?)

Q. How long does law school take? (more…)

I mean no disrespect to Lincoln, Washington, or Fillmore when I say that George W. Bush is the greatest American president in this nation’s history - nay, the greatest American president in world history.

How great is Bush? He makes Calvin Coolidge look like Benjamin Harrison, Benjamin Harrison look like Franklin Pierce, and Franklin Pierce look like a bucket of whale excrement. Bush’s awesomeness knows no bounds. He is just the best ever. I can’t believe this even needs to be debated. (more…)

I’m amazed O.J. had enough energy to smile for his mug shot last weekend. He had a pretty busy few days.

Last Thursday his book, “If I Did It,” was released. It’s basically his confession to the murders of two people, including his ex-wife, 13 years ago. Hard to believe the media never picked up that story - you’d think if a famous athlete were accused of murder, we’d have heard something about it. (more…)

Kiddies, today Uncle Scott is going to put aside partisan rancor and address a topic upon which we can all agree: abortion.

It’s been the hottest political issue since Roe v. Wade was decided 34 years ago, yet neither side argues the debate on proper terms. Everybody is wrong. (more…)

Just found this on Onion Sports: http://www.theonion.com/content/node/54781

I didn’t really know what to make of Peyton Manning until his turn as host of SNL earlier this year. Now, like with Brett Favre, I love the quarterback but hate his team. That SNL episode was hilarious, and Manning’s self-spoof as a kid-hating mentor in a fake United Way promo (a.k.a., the funniest commercial parody in the history of the show) demonstrates a self-deprecating sense of humor and genuine modesty that make him a real human being and not just a superhero quarterback.

At halftime of Saturday’s Illinois-Western Illinois football game, Dan Maloney will watch from his seat in the stands as the band performs without any mascot. He doesn’t think he will cry, but he knows it will be tough.

Maloney was Chief Illiniwek, back when there was a Chief Illiniwek. He was the last student to do the high kicks and split jumps in the regalia sold to the University by a Sioux chief in 1982. (more…)