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	<title>Scott Green &#187; TV</title>
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	<link>http://scottsays.com</link>
	<description>ScottSays.com - the collected works of humor columnist Scott Green</description>
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		<copyright>2007-2008 </copyright>
		<managingEditor>scott@scottsays.com (Scott Green)</managingEditor>
		<webMaster>scott@scottsays.com (Scott Green)</webMaster>
		<category>posts</category>
		<ttl>1440</ttl>
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		<itunes:summary>This is humor columnist Scott Green as you have never heard him before:  With your ears.  Scott has been making readers spit coffee out their noses for years, even when they were not drinking coffee, though he admits this is largely due to his appearance.  The Scott Green Podcast:  Illiteracy has never been so much fun.</itunes:summary>
		<itunes:author>Scott Green</itunes:author>
		<itunes:category text="Comedy"/>
<itunes:category text="Education">
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<itunes:category text="Society &amp; Culture"/>
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			<itunes:name>Scott Green</itunes:name>
			<itunes:email>scott@scottsays.com</itunes:email>
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			<title>Scott Green</title>
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		<title>Our newest justice, after these messages</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2010/05/03/our-newest-justice-after-these-messages-2/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2010/05/03/our-newest-justice-after-these-messages-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 03 May 2010 14:47:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[American Idol]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Law]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Supreme Court]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/?p=784</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Here are two facts that seem, on their face, unrelated:
1.  Barack Obama is about to choose John Paul Stevens’ replacement on the Supreme Court.
2.  “American Idol” is still the top rated show in America.
I think you see where I’m going with this:  Stevens should beat Simon Cowell to death with his gavel.
If that’s not practical, [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Spoiled by spoilers, but &#8220;Lost&#8221; without them</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2010/04/01/spoiled-by-spoilers-but-lost-without-them/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2010/04/01/spoiled-by-spoilers-but-lost-without-them/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Apr 2010 21:11:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Movies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/?p=762</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Author’s note:  Although this column is about the ending of “Lost,” it contains no spoilers.  I have gone to great lengths to avoid revealing, for example, that the smoke monster is actually Keyser Soze.  Also:  Oz was Dorothy’s dream.  Thank you.
I’m an American, which means I feel entitled to whatever I want, whenever I want [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>You&#8217;re Ghana love the Snow Leopard</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2010/02/18/youre-ghana-love-the-snow-leopard/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2010/02/18/youre-ghana-love-the-snow-leopard/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 18 Feb 2010 15:49:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Athletes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/?p=645</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sure the Winter Olympics have been beset by problems like the torch lighting snafu and the murderous luge track and that Vancouver’s been 74 and sunny.  But the viewing audience has largely overlooked these problems, because we’ve overlooked the entire Olympics.
Granted, ratings are high.  But it’s not to watch the majesty of competition.  It’s because, [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>WedTV</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2009/09/14/wedtv/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2009/09/14/wedtv/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 14 Sep 2009 23:25:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Michelle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Weddings]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/?p=572</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I was deeply in love with my girlfriend and couldn’t see spending my life with anyone else, so it was time to prove it, by listening for hours about which shade of white our wedding tablecloths should be.
I know more about wedding details than I want, but less than I should.  I’m getting married next [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Stop this commercial or innocent men will dye</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2009/09/08/stop-this-commercial-or-innocent-men-will-dye/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2009/09/08/stop-this-commercial-or-innocent-men-will-dye/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 08 Sep 2009 10:00:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Advertising]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/?p=563</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The world would truly be a better place if we all joined hands and sang in harmony and shot whoever writes Just For Men’s TV commercials.
I’ve seen this one ad about a hundred times.  It features two girls, maybe six and eight, who give their dad a box of Just For Men in the hopes [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Our newest justice, after these messages</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2009/04/09/our-newest-justice-after-these-messages/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2009/04/09/our-newest-justice-after-these-messages/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 09 Apr 2009 18:51:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[American Idol]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Illustration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jake Thompson Cartoon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Law]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Supreme Court]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/2009/04/09/our-newest-justice-after-these-messages/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Here are two facts that seem, on their face, unrelated:
1. Speculation is ramping up about which Supreme Court justices might die or retire this year, and who could replace them.
2. “American Idol” is still the top rated show in America.
I think you see where I’m going with this:  The justices should beat Simon Cowell [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://scottsays.com/2009/04/09/our-newest-justice-after-these-messages/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Hey, Fox News Channel!  Come on, do your worst</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2008/07/09/hey-fox-news-channel-come-on-do-your-worst/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2008/07/09/hey-fox-news-channel-come-on-do-your-worst/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 09 Jul 2008 23:23:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Idiots]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Partisanship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/2008/07/09/hey-fox-news-channel-come-on-do-your-worst/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[There&#8217;s a code of ethics in the news media which, as far as I can tell, serves no practical purpose. You&#8217;d sell a lot more papers if you could make up headlines like &#8220;McCain grows to colossal size; uses laser-vision to slash budget.&#8221; That&#8217;s why working at Fox News is such a plum job &#8211; [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://scottsays.com/2008/07/09/hey-fox-news-channel-come-on-do-your-worst/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Beg for it, Hillary</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2008/06/25/beg-for-it-hillary/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2008/06/25/beg-for-it-hillary/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Jun 2008 23:22:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Commerce]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Partisanship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/2008/06/02/beg-for-it-hillary/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If you really wanted to make Barack Obama the next President of the United States, you would go online right now and make a large contribution to Hillary Clinton&#8217;s campaign.
I&#8217;m not certain why this helps Obama, but in a new video posted on HillaryClinton.com, the New York senator asks America to join her in supporting [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://scottsays.com/2008/06/25/beg-for-it-hillary/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>My &#8216;Harding&#8217; miniseries has what HBO&#8217;s &#8216;John Adams&#8217; lacked:  nudity</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2008/04/24/my-harding-miniseries-has-what-hbos-john-adams-lacked-nudity/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2008/04/24/my-harding-miniseries-has-what-hbos-john-adams-lacked-nudity/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 24 Apr 2008 23:18:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[History]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/2008/04/24/my-harding-miniseries-has-what-hbos-john-adams-lacked-nudity/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sometimes it is perfectly appropriate to have an opinion on something you have never experienced. For example, I have an opinion on abortion, even though I have never personally been aborted.
This is the case with &#8220;John Adams,&#8221; the HBO miniseries that aired its final episode Sunday night. I never watched it, but I&#8217;ve heard it [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://scottsays.com/2008/04/24/my-harding-miniseries-has-what-hbos-john-adams-lacked-nudity/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>So you&#8217;ve decided to burn down an orphanage</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2008/04/10/so-youve-decided-to-burn-down-an-orphanage/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2008/04/10/so-youve-decided-to-burn-down-an-orphanage/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 10 Apr 2008 16:24:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Current Events]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rod Blagojevich]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scandals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/2008/04/10/so-youve-decided-to-burn-down-an-orphanage/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Today&#8217;s topic is how you, an average citizen who just happens to be a major scumbag politician, can avoid public scorn. The simple secret is to come clean before anyone suspects something is wrong. For example, let&#8217;s say you are a United States Congressperson who intends to set fire to the Orphanage For Really Cute [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://scottsays.com/2008/04/10/so-youve-decided-to-burn-down-an-orphanage/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Big Ten Network perks finally unveiled</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2008/03/28/big-ten-network-perks-finally-unveiled/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2008/03/28/big-ten-network-perks-finally-unveiled/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 29 Mar 2008 04:53:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Commerce]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fighting Illini]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sports]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/2008/03/28/big-ten-network-perks-finally-unveiled/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The Big Ten Network has finally won my support, and all it had to do was use a classic logic-based argument that has convinced people of things for years: &#8220;You can have free beer.&#8221;
Before the beer I was unhappy about BTN, a television network ostensibly aiming to further the mission statements the esteemed institutions of [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://scottsays.com/2008/03/28/big-ten-network-perks-finally-unveiled/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>SNN:  The Scott News Network</title>
		<link>http://scottsays.com/2008/02/07/snn-the-scott-news-network/</link>
		<comments>http://scottsays.com/2008/02/07/snn-the-scott-news-network/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 07 Feb 2008 06:29:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Scott Green</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor Columns]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Idiots]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Partisanship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://scottsays.com/2008/02/07/snn-the-scott-news-network/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;m going to found my own cable news network, and we&#8217;re going to have award-winning election coverage. I spent Tuesday evening in the Daily Illini newsroom watching election results on CNN and MSNBC, networks I usually pay little mind. We had these channels on because we are a top-tier bastion of journalism, and also because [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://scottsays.com/2008/02/07/snn-the-scott-news-network/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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